fuck you, summer of 2009.

everyone has cancer, and everyone is dying.

everyone's relationships are broken and ending.

everyone i love is far away.

and i spend my days at the hospital with my mom, texting my best friend, insisting that what bob marley said was true, that every little thing is going to be alright.

bluegrass, dark chocolate, and failed attempts to sleep.

i have a problem.

from june 20th (the day i left for vacation) through july 15th (my birthday), i acquired these:

1-2. birthday gifts from lauren.

3-8. tim's used books, provincetown, ma.

9-11. betterworldbooks.com

12. yellow house books, great barrington, ma.

13-16. kent memorial library book sale, kent, ct.

17. moda fina, provincetown, ma.

books. especially used books. finding a book with a new price scrawled in pencil on the first page. a book given as a gift, from someone who knows the way to my heart. books sitting on wooden shelves as a testament to where i've been, and the books piled next to my bed...

well, where i hope to be.

i would prefer to read for a living.

in other words, i spent yesterday at the aquarium in mystic.

gone.

i was in cape cod from the 20th to the 27th.

it rained. i got sunburned. i bought books. i ate fudge. i saw seals.

tomorrow i pick up echo from the airport.

i haven't seen her in a year.

i am feeling lonely and blue.

i will be sleeping in the woods for the next five days.

i am looking forward to a change.

sunday.

i went on a solo adventure through litchfield county.

i drove up drinking a naked smoothie and eating red pepper hummus on an onion roll.

i listened to right away, great captain, the entire way there and back.

i explored a one room schoolhouse in new milford.

i strolled the grounds of the sloane-stanley museum in kent.

i walked through a covered bridge over the housatonic river.

i peeked in the windows of a pottery shop in cornwall.

and ate dark, organic mint chocolate by the old tollhouse.

i am reminded why i moved from my city back home, to new england. 

driving up route seven takes my breath away.

just a few things.

the other day it was said to me, "are you really into summer camp or something?  you look like a jewish camp counselor."

today i drank a travel mug with two teabags of tazo awake black tea.  it hit me an hour later and i talked nonstop like i was on speed.  i forget that tea legitimately has caffeine in it.

i got spit on (in the face) today.  again.  at work.

i leave for the cape on saturday.

I suck at blogging.

This is is the list of blog posts I tell myself to write:

1.  HIKE:  Devil's Den, Redding.

2.  HIKE:  Bear Mountain, Danbury.

3.  HIKE:  Cobble Mountain, Macedonia State Park, Kent.

4.  HIKE:  Lover's Leap, New Milford.

5.  PURCHASES:  $1 loot at Michael's.

6.  REVIEW: Free organic samples from drugstore.com.

7.  REVIEW:  Finished products: Organix Shampoo, Dr. Bronner's Shampoo, Neutrogena Facial Scrub, Bath & Body Works Orange and Ginger Body Wash.

8.  PURCHASES:  Shoes: Simple Shoes (organic, vegan), Air Force Ones.

9.  HIKE:  Squantz Pond, New Fairfield.

10.  PURCHASES: Trader Joe's: Hated (whole grain bread, tortillas, plain hummus), Loved (raw crunchy almond butter, red bell pepper hummus)

11.  SCHOOL:  Thwarted graduate school plans and resulting lack of direction.

12.  TRIP: Four days in Savannah with my sister.

13.  POETRY:  "Structure of the Embryonic Rat Brain" by Christopher Janke

14.  POETRY: "The Book of Flashlights, Clover, and Milk" by Joshua Marie Wilkinson

15.  HIKE: Steep Rock, Washington.

16.  HIKE: Appalachian Trail & Bull's Bridge, Kent.

17.  TRIP: Upcoming Cape Cod vacation.

18.  TRIP: Plans for Appalachian backpacking with Echo.

 

...but, you know, I haven't.  Posted on any of these topics.

I don't know where to start!